We accept the love we think we deserve
– Stephen Chbosky
How I feel is always valid, how I act is always my choice. My feelings, my emotions, my history are all valid. Nobody gets to tell me how I should feel. My feelings are mine and I get to own them. Sometimes whether I want to or not. Especially when I don’t want to.
Nobody else gets to have them, and nobody else can make me feel any particular way. Even when I feel “provoked” or “manipulated”, they’re still my feelings. Nobody else controls how I feel. Nobody else is responsible for resolving or processing or controlling my feelings.
I don’t control anybody else’s feelings. I can’t make anybody else feel sad, or happy, or guilty, or ashamed. Yes, I must consider about how my actions and words affect others. Especially the people I care about. But that won’t hold me back from acting with authenticity, courage, and honesty when I need to.
And no matter how I feel, I am always the only one responsible and accountable for how I act and what I say. How I act or react is always my choice, my decision, and my responsibility.
I can be courageous with dignity. I can be honest with kindness. I can be authentic with love. I can model the dignity, honesty, and authenticity I want to see in the world.
Also Known As:
Be mad all you want, just don’t be cruel
Part of my Ten Things I Know To Be True series.