I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become. – Carl Jung
Regret keeps us locked in a recurring spiral of recrimination from which there seems no escape. I am human. I will make mistakes. I will try to learn from every one of them and try again.
Making the same mistake over and over again is also a mistake. Living my life trying to avoid any mistake is a mistake. I will live to win, not live to avoid losing. These are two very different ways of framing the same outcome, and it makes a real difference to my happiness, success, and my affect on those around me.
The moment that counts the most is this one, and sometimes the one that comes right after it. Not the one that just passed. That past’s value lies in what I learned from it, not wishing I’d done things differently.
Not that I should always be starting over. I should, however, be ready to change, adapt, and seize opportunities as they come. To dig in and try again in different ways for things that are important if I believe it’s still possible. To shed that things that are no longer working for me and are unlikely to change.
I can and should be ready to always be honest with myself. To examine critically what I’m good at or not, how I’m feeling and why, and what I’m willing to sacrifice or not. To be authentic and true to myself and honest with those I love.
It is never too late to say I’m sorry, admit a mistake, and start again. It’s not the successes that shapes my character. It’s how I deal with my failures and mistakes, and how I learn from every one.
Corollary: Do what you can, with what you have, where you are – Theodore Roosevelt
Part of my Ten Things I Know To Be True series.